151. today's last

coming back again,
yesterday was Amy's birthday, of course celebrated with her
but will update about it soon :)
anyway, "HAPPY 19th Birthday, Amy!"

I really felt touched,
when I received a text message from one of my friend during the dinner (yesterday)
I almost want to tears out after I read the text,
I am not so sure why,
maybe she cared too much for me?
or maybe the reminder of today's the last day for me to....?
I really don't know.
kindda felt a little unhappy but I handled the feeling, no ruin the celebration :)
luckily have shasha who always cheer people up! :P
thanks,sha :)
I kept it to myself, and the laughter make me forget the pain and the thoughts.

so yeah,
I had make a promise to myself and my dears,
that today will be the last day for me to tears and think about Y.
I really want to wash away the memories that break me down
cause we don't see any turning back, it seems like Y has fallen to another person.
there are a lot times, I find reasons of my actions to his actions.
and I realized this is really something silly I did to relate myself to him.
I will accept the truth. I will not tell lies to myself any more.
I am tired. I am just fooling myself and feelings.
I have waited almost a year, how silly right?
so I will really take this night, a great night for the end.
bye!